Do We Owe This Boyfriend an Apology?




June 9, 2015

We recently received the following e-mail from Yu Chen, a 29-year-old engineer supervisor in California who moved to the U.S. from China when she was 16.

I listened to the episode on diamonds and asked my boyfriend for a gold bar for engagement instead. Then I heard the episode on quitting, so I broke up with him. I’ve been very happy ever since! Thank you for the awesome podcasts!

Nice to see that we are getting results!

I followed up with Yu by e-mail and this is what she had to say:

Recently my family has been pressuring me to find someone. So I try to apply what I know to dating. I was ecstatic when I heard the episode on online dating. I used match.com to meet my two previous boyfriends. I used a screening system where “candidates” must be able to produce meaningful conversations with me via email for two weeks prior to the “interview.” Then I staked the interviews. I met as much as three candidates a week. I realize it’s a two-way choice. We make our selections within the first three dates. This allowed me to meet the most qualifying candidates in a short amount of time.

I thank Freakonomics and TED Talks for my recent break up. Freakonomics told me that I would be less likely to regret if I were to quit. TED Talks said I should reject everyone within the first 37% of my dating window and marry the next best thing. So I shall reject everyone I meet before 28.7. I’m on the right track.




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